Let’s cut to the chase. Why is a 3-year-old kid in a reading den with a four-pack of Stella at her sister’s Parents’ Evening? Moments like that stay with you forever; stay with my mate forever. It’s his story. Honest.
Of course it was perfectly innocent. During an earlier appointment, one Dad had presented him with four beers as a thank you for going above and beyond in support of his child. A truly celebratory meeting; the kind of appointment and family-teacher relationship that gets us out of bed and keeps us coming back for more. He reluctantly accepted the lovely gesture and – feeling slightly embarrassed – placed them in the IKEA circus tent reading den, within arms reach. All was good until the penultimate appointment; a family-affair with siblings in attendance – a potential banana-skin. The conversation was flowing; the evening drawing to an end. My mate had one eye on the 7:45 Champions League game he was certain he’d miss. Maybe that cost him? That split-second loss of concentration. The siblings were in the tent. In what I’m told was a hazy muffled sound, one child emerged clutching cans of premium strength lager. ‘Mummy; what are these?’
I’m sure you’ve seen those films when the special effects team make time stand still in and around the main character. The exaggerated facial expressions and dream-like camera overlay. Yes. That’s pretty much where my mate was. The parents glanced continuously between their Stella-cradling toddler and their daughter’s teacher. Now I never got to hear the end of that story. He made it through the appointment but cannot recall anything from said beer discovery to that Champions League game. Rumour has it that the Stella remains untouched to this day.
Please don’t feel like I’m stitching him up. He told his Head that very evening; who took it really well.
We’ve all had Parents’ Evening horror stories. If you feel like getting yours – or your mate’s – tales of woe off your chest, head over to the Facebook thread and add yours to the comments section.
Thanks for the great work you’re all doing. Keep on keeping on…